Last Friday Night

5/2/16

It's a bit odd not knowing what I'm fighting because it's hard to know what to expect. I suppose even if someone tells me it's MS I still won't know what to expect so having that answer my not solve anything. Instead, I'm trying to get better at noting my own issues and doing some research about MS to get more ideas about handling my disabilities.

Last Friday night I went to one of Jeff's gigs in town. I really enjoyed my time out and even managed to drive myself home. My driving is limited because I get confused very easy and my vision is affected by moving objects. I have discovered I can drive around 25mph - but anything over 30 or 35mph is awful for me to process. Lights, rain, tree shadows, too many cars with too much action can all really make a big difference along with being tired or having a migraine. But... I am trying to move forward and make improvements any way I can.

It was awesome to get out of the house and see my friends. I am learning which way to sit in a restaurant (so the flashing lights don't bother me) and towards the back instead of the front of the bar. I wear earplugs and sunglasses to mellow my senses out a little. Some people have asked what happens if I don't block everything out. The best way to explain it is that I get a major shock down the right side of my body. It physically hurts me if things are too loud or too overwhelming. I have a whole new appreciation for people with sensory issues.

Getting out of the house takes energy - and it's amazing how much energy taking a shower takes - and walking around with my walking sticks is also exhausting - but it's worth it to see my husband play and sing while being amongst my friends. It was awesome seeing everyone having such a great time and actually being a part of it too.

I am constantly aware my disease could be worse. I've been to the hospital many times for physical rehab and I see many people who have much worse things to deal with. I am grateful everyday for the time I am able to spend with my family. I have an incredible support system and an amazing husband!!